Jarod Kintz Quotes That Will Inspire You to Live Your Best Life

1. Have you ever had a prophetic dream about my duck farm being as successful in the future as The Spicy Chicken Sandwich? No? Well, try harder! For better results, sleep longer. One Out of Ten Dentists Agree: This Book Helps Fight Gingivitis. Maybe Tomorrow I’ll Ask Nine More Dentists.: A BearPaw Duck And Meme Farm Production

2. I used to have an eagle for a mustache. I made FREEDOM music when I whistled. Now I'm wiser. Now I have a duck above my upper lip. Music is fluid, and my saxophone overflows when my ducks slosh in the sounds I make in elevators.

3. You don't need a vacation. You just need to dig a pond on your land and buy some ducks, and then you can enjoy moments of escapism without ever leaving your property. Music is fluid, and my saxophone overflows when my ducks slosh in the sounds I make in elevators.

4. BearPaw Duck Farm tours are no longer at 4:00. Tours are now at 3:60, like a circle, which gives us more time to get around. BearPaw Duck And Meme Farm presents: Two Ducks Brawling Is A Pre-Pillow Fight

5. Duck farming has taught me that my day-to-day thinking changes in a gradient that's subtle and unnoticeable when observed in 24-hour blocks, but becomes obvious when seen in longer time frames. In the past two years I've changed from pink to blue, but it was all purple to me. Music is fluid, and my saxophone overflows when my ducks slosh in the sounds I make in elevators.

6. I haven't changed since starting BearPaw Duck Farm. I still like my relationships like I like my eggs: Over easy. BearPaw Duck And Meme Farm presents: Two Ducks Brawling Is A Pre-Pillow Fight

7. I just talked to an old duck farmer who told me he remembers me from when I was three months old. I replied, Oh, I recall that. That was June of ’82. I told you the stock market would crash in five years, around October, and you scoffed and called me a pessimist. Music is fluid, and my saxophone overflows when my ducks slosh in the sounds I make in elevators.

8. I like my duck eggs cooked like I like my relationships: Over easy. One Out of Ten Dentists Agree: This Book Helps Fight Gingivitis. Maybe Tomorrow I’ll Ask Nine More Dentists.: A BearPaw Duck And Meme Farm Production

9. In competitive swimming, you increase your time in the pool to decrease your time in the pool, and that seems like a complete waste of time to me. Why not buy a duck from me and let it do all your swimming? BearPaw Duck And Meme Farm presents: Two Ducks Brawling Is A Pre-Pillow Fight

10. It used to be thought that time travel was impossible. But that was in the past, before the future went back and made its predecessor come after, rearranging The Order and causing all animals on earth to be confused except for the ducks, who predicted this event in the year 2244. One Out of Ten Dentists Agree: This Book Helps Fight Gingivitis. Maybe Tomorrow I’ll Ask Nine More Dentists.: A BearPaw Duck And Meme Farm Production

11. My favorite part about a wind farm is the invisible fruit that it yields. Plus, it's like a garden of giant metal flowers, and that's almost as romantic as a book composed exclusively of duck quotes. Music is fluid, and my saxophone overflows when my ducks slosh in the sounds I make in elevators.

12. Of all the animals that fly, some are like floating flowers (butterflies), some are songbirds that are full of gulp (swallows), and some are swimming birds that also run marathons (ducks). When I compose music to be performed live in an elevator, those are my inspirations. Music is fluid, and my saxophone overflows when my ducks slosh in the sounds I make in elevators.

13. She said she loved me, and I believed her, because she was looking directly at another man when she said it. It's the extra romance that gives my Duck Soup the flavor that sticks in your mouth for weeks, if not years. BearPaw Duck And Meme Farm presents: Two Ducks Brawling Is A Pre-Pillow Fight

14. Time flies and flies time. I know, because I sold them a tiny stopwatch. They love to race. But they aren't quite fast enough to avoid being snacks for my ducks. Music is fluid, and my saxophone overflows when my ducks slosh in the sounds I make in elevators.

15. Time flies, it's true. But what kind of wings does it have, butterfly wings, bat wings, or eagle wings? None. It has the wings of a duck, which is why I'm surprised nobody in history has noticed that time also swims. Music is fluid, and my saxophone overflows when my ducks slosh in the sounds I make in elevators.

16. Time is fluid, like the wide sky that fades into bright orange in a sunset in The Ozarks. Here on my duck farm, every moment is meant to be sipped and savored like a slow mimosa. Music is fluid, and my saxophone overflows when my ducks slosh in the sounds I make in elevators.

17. What is the nature of work? If it doesn’t involve nature, it’s work, and if you labor around ducks, then it’s more like meditation time. One Out of Ten Dentists Agree: This Book Helps Fight Gingivitis. Maybe Tomorrow I’ll Ask Nine More Dentists.: A BearPaw Duck And Meme Farm Production