1. My love, this is the problem with your generation. Instant gratification, he says, and because it took him, on average, forty-three minutes to come, because I put on the ears and the tail and learned the lyrics to Painting the Roses Red backward and forward, because I drank approximately five gallons of cranberry juice over the course of our relationship, and for a day or two required the use of a cane, I take issue with his definition of instant.
Luster