Shelley Brown-Weird Girl Adventures from A to Z Quotes That Will Inspire You to Live Your Best Life

1. Besides being a low, loud talker and a fast walker, I am a chain breaker. If you send me something to repost because it’s going to cure cancer or save someone’s life, I will break every chain. I’m sorry that I’m responsible for the continued suffering of so many.

2. Elephants don’t belong in rooms, and damaging thoughts don’t belong in our hearts.I am going to kick the elephant out of the room, slay this shit, and embrace the most important truth I’ve ever learned. I am not what I do or what I look like. I am just who I am.

3. Friendship equals no appointment required.

4. Growing up with a feminist mother was confusing and, at times, felt simply abnormal. But if my mom wasn’t who she was, I wouldn’t be who I am. As matter of fact, women like my mother were the pioneers who taught many of us perseverance and endurance.

5. I am a latchkey kid who gets relentlessly teased every day at school. I want to die. I try to overdose on four aspirin.

6. I can’t bear to wear flats, and it’s not a height thing. The rounded toe of the ballet slipper-style shoes do not appeal to me. Let’s face it, none of us over thirty, forty, fifty and on, are ballerinas. No, girls, Pilates is not ballet.I’ve been told I am built like a ballerina, but I’ve also been told I dance like a stripper. Did you ever ask someone how they thought you dance? You may be in shock, or maybe they will be.

7. I cleaned out my closet and threw out the clothes that didn’t fit, the clothes that were old, the clothes that were stained, the clothes that were tight, and the clothes that were loose until there was nothing in my closet. I stand here naked, and see who I really am.

8. I have this craving to be some ball-buster chick who, when you look at her, think, She likes her rock hard, her cock hard, and her liquor harder, yet I know that this striving has everything to do with the what’s lurking behind my softer feminine side.Hard and edgy. I know them well. I sought them out, tried them on and wore them in the many forms so many of us do, from fuck me to fuck you, and everything in between.

9. I want to thank the friend who went under that bathroom stall for reminding me that when you are a friend, you just do…

10. I was fourteen years-old, singing and strumming away on my six-string acoustic guitar to the songs of the sixties and seventies limited to the aforementioned Cocaine, Leaving on a Jet Plane, and House of the Rising Sun. I had no idea Lola was a man and someone else was glad they were a man. I always tell people, I’ve been to that desert. I’ve been on that horse and he did have a name, I just was never allowed to tell anyone.

11. If you love me and I’m feeling sad, please buy me paper towels, preferably Bounty in a six-pack or greater. Having a cabinet full of paper towels gives me a feeling of abundance, so please do this for me if you love me. Won’t you? Paper towels equals happy Weird Girl.

12. My personal hell is a place filled with loud, cocky, inked hipster—millennials. It’s a place where every guy looks like a member of Mumford & Sons, and all the women shun makeup. No, it isn’t Lollapalooza, nor an Arcade Fire concert. No, it isn’t some hipster independent coffee shop serving the latest trend in cold brewed coffee and a donut. No, not a craft cocktail lounge playing Daft Punk on vinyl while everyone sits on low striped cushions and corduroy couches wearing color schemes of pants and tops that make no sense.I’ll give you a hint. A woman walked around wearing a t-shirt stating, Data is the new bacon. Excuse me, but fuck you, it is not!Okay, fine. Last hint. All the Mumford & Sons dudes and non-makeup wearing inked millennials are wearing the exact same shirt.Slap yourself if you get this wrong. My hell is the APPLE STORE!

13. My teeth were now as white as Chiclets, but hey you can never be too thin, too rich or have white enough teeth. If you ever want to see the results, I’ll send you some of my wedding photos where I am straining to get the most teeth visibility possible.

14. The bottom line is you don’t have to understand something to like it, and you don’t have to understand someone to like them.

15. There is a moment when you just know it and can’t deny it. It’s simply the irrefutable truth, and now you have to change the situation because it’s no longer working for you. Maybe you come to the realization gradually, or maybe you come to it like a nearly missed red light when you stomp on the brake, and it’s right there, unmistakable.It’s the moment when you realize there is only one cool person in the relationship or dating thingy, and it’s not the other person.