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Why is it a bad idea to eat a clock? Because it's so time-consuming.
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Why is it a bad idea to iron a four leaf clover? Because you shouldn’t press your luck!
Why is it so cheap to throw a party at a haunted house? Because the ghosts bring all the boos.
Why is Peter Pan always flying? Because he Neverlands
Why is the letter A like a flower? Because a “b” comes after it!
Why should you never brush your teeth with your left hand? Because a toothbrush works better.
Why was 2019 afraid of 2020? Because they had a fight and 2021.
Why were they called the “dark ages?” Because there were a lot of knights.
Why'd the alternate universe Spider-Man do so well on his driving test? He's an excellent parallel Parker.
Women should not have children after 36—really, 36 children is enough.
Yesterday, I was washing the car with my son. He said, “Dad, can’t you just use a sponge?”
You know why you never see elephants hiding up in trees? Because they’re really good at it.
You see my next-door neighbour worships exhaust pipes, he’s a Catholic converter.
You used to be able to get air for free at gas stations, but now it's a $1. That's inflation for you.
