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Johnny's dad had told Johnny that if he could get an A+ on his final exam, he could get any ice cream flavor he wanted plus a pizza. When the day for the final exam came, the professor said, "There are three questions on this exam. You will have one hour to answer them all and no more. Anyone caught taking any longer or cheating will get an automatic F." When Johnny received the paper, he read the first question. As he read it, he realized the exam was no piece of cake so he worked as hard as he could. When he finally finished question one, he checked the clock. There was only 5 minutes left! At this rate, he wouldn't be able to finish in time. As Johnny looked around, he saw that there were hundreds of students and figured that he could get away with a few extra minutes, so he worked away past the hour mark. As Johnny went to turn in his paper, the professor stopped him. "Young man," the professor said sternly. "I saw you keep working long after the 1-hour mark. You were caught cheating and will get an F." Thinking quickly, Johnny replied, "Do you know who I am?" The professor stoically responded, "I neither know or care who you are. You need to learn respect and discipline." "Good." said Johnny and he ran away. When the day for the exam scores to be announced came, Johnny received an A+. How?

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Jordan is leaving from a small town in Wyoming and hiking through the wilderness to a post where he will spend the summer. The hike will take Jordan six days. One man can only carry enough food and water for four days. Jordan cannot take a mule or any other animal to haul his food and water, because there will be insufficient food and supplies for the animals at his destination. How can Jordan make it to his destination?
Answer:- Jordan takes two other hikers with him. Each hiker starts out with a four day supply of food and water. After the first day, the first hiker gives a one day supply to each Jordan and the second hiker. This leaves the first hiker with a one day supply to go home and Jordan and the second hiker now each have a four day supply again. After the second day, the second hiker gives Jordan a one day supply and keep a two day supply for himself so that he can get home. This gives Jordan a four day supply of food and water, and now he has enough to reach his destination.
Knock, Knock! Whos there? Ivan. Ivan who?
Answer:- Ivan to suck your blood.
Late afternoons I often bathe. I'll soak in water piping hot. My essence goes through my see through clothes. Used up am I; I've gone to pot. What am I?
Answer:- I'm a tea bag!
Lauren and Alice are talking long distance on the phone. Lauren is in an East-Coast US state which borders the Atlantic Ocean, and Alice is in a West-Coast state which borders the Pacific Ocean. Lauren asks Alice: "What time is it?" Alice replies and Lauren says: "That's really odd. It's the same time here!" How can this be?
Answer:- Alice is in Eastern Oregon (in Mountain time) and Lauren is in Western Florida (in Central time). It is the night that daylight-savings time changes back to standard time any time after 1:00 and before 2:00 AM.
Lazy Larry agreed to work on a job for his brother-in-law for thirty hours at eight dollars an hour, on the condition that he would forfeit ten dollars per hour for every hour that he idled. At the end of the thirty hours Larry wasn't owed any money and didn't owe his brother-in-law any money either. How many hours did Larry work and how many hours did he idle?
Answer:- Lazy Larry worked 16-2/3 hours and idled 13-1/3 hours. 16-2/3 hours, at $8.00 an hour amounts to the same amount as 13-1/3 hours at $10.00 per hour.
Little Tommy Tittletat took two Ts, to tie two ups to two tall trees, to torment the terrible little tat. How many T's in all of that?
Answer:- There are 2 T's in all of ThaT.
Look in my face, I am somebody; Look in my back, I am nobody. What am I?
Answer:- I am a mirror.
Lynn likes grapes but not potatoes. She likes squash but not lettuce, and she likes peas but not onions. Following the same rule, will she like pumpkins or apples?
Answer:- Pumpkins. Lynn only likes things that grow on vines.
Man walks over, man walks under, in times of war he burns asunder. What is it?
Answer:- A Bridge.
Many hands make light work. What is the contradictory proverb?
Answer:- Too many cooks spoil the broth.
Many years ago, a wealthy old man was near death. He wished to leave his fortune to one of his three children. The old man wanted to know that his fortune would be in wise hands. He stipulated that his estate would be left to the child who would sing him half as many songs as days that he had left to live. The eldest son said he couldn't comply because he didn't know how many days his father had left to live, and besides he was too busy. The youngest son said the same thing. The man ended up leaving his money to his third child, a daughter. What did his daughter do?
Answer:- Every other day, the daughter sang her father a song.
Many-manned scud-thumper, Maker of worn wood, Shrub-ruster, Sky-mocker, Rave! Portly pusher, Wind-slave. What am I?
Answer:- The ocean!
Marble walls as white as milk, lined with skin as soft as silk, in a fountain crystal clear, a golden apple will appear, there is no key to this stronghold, yet theives break in and steal the gold. What is it?
Answer:- An egg.
Marco and Bob have been the best friends ever since they were little kids. They are also very competitive. Throughout the years they have challenged each other to do both physical and mental challenges. And they completed the challenge. But one day Marco thought of something to challenge Bob to do - something he could start but never finish. The average man could do it and so could Mark and they were both the same sex and the same size. It is a physical challenge. Can you figure out what it was?
Answer:- Marco challenged Bob to get a tan, but he couldn't...Bob is an albino.