Joke: Why did the man egg push the woman egg?
Answer: To see her crack.
Joke: Why did the man get a new car for his wife?
Answer: It was a great trade!
Joke: Why did the man get thrown out of the banana factory?
Answer: Because he kept throwing the bent ones away!
Joke: Why did the man sleep in and miss the funeral?
Answer: He's not a mourning person!
Joke: Why did the man take a hammer to bed?
Answer: He wanted to hit the sack.
Joke: Why did the man take Viagra every night?
Answer: So he wouldn't roll out of bed?
Joke: Why did the mathematician name his dog "Cauchy?"
Answer: He left a residue at every pole.
Joke: Why did the mathematician spill all of his food in the oven?
Answer: The directions said "Put in the oven at 180 degrees."
Joke: Why did the mathematician want the 20011 square foot house?
Answer: It was prime real estate (20011 is prime).
Joke: Why did the melon jump into the lake?
Answer: It wanted to be a watermelon.
Joke: Why did the nurse bring a red pen to work?
Answer: To draw blood.
Joke: Why did the old woman tie skates on the rocking chair?
Answer: Because she wanted to rock and roll.
Joke: Why did the one handed woman cross the road?
Answer: To get to the second hand shop!
Joke: Why did the opera singer go sailing?
Answer: Because she wanted to hit the high C’s.