Why didn't Mr. Tomato win the race?
Answer:- He couldn't ketchup. (He couldn't catch up)
Why didn't the 11 year old enter the pirate movie?
Answer:- It was rated "ARR".
Why didn't the butterfly go to the dance?
Answer:- Beacause it was a moth ball.
Why didn't the car feel well?
Answer:- It had gas.
Why didn't the turkey finish it's dessert?
Answer:- Because it was stuffed.
Why do black sheep eat less than white sheep?
Answer:- Because there are less black sheep in the world than white.
Why do chickens lay eggs?
Answer:- Because if they drop them, they will break.
Why do cows wear bells?
Answer:- Because their horns don't work.
Why do Egyptian pyramids have doorbells?
Answer:- So you toot-'n'-come-in.
Why do they not allow you to fart in an Apple Store?
Answer:- Because They don't have Windows.
Why do witches buy magazines?
Answer:- They like to read the horrorscopes.
Why does a chicken coop have two doors?
Answer:- Because, if it had four it would be a sedan.
Why does a dragon sleep all day?
Answer:- So it can hunt knights!
Why doesn't Suzy's Husband gamble anymore?
Answer:- Casinos better!